Communications consultant Leil Lowndes points out in How to Talk to Anyone that people lose 30% of their energy when talking over the phone. This loss of energy may make you come off as a Debbie Downer, or even worse, unenthusiastic about maintaining a relation. To avoid losing this possible connection, Lowndes suggests to hike up the energy level – you may think you sound ridiculous, but really, you actually sound like how you would if it were a face-to-face conversation. Why? Well, the lack of a physical connection creates an emphasis on the need for an emotional one; so when you think about it, you’re allocating the connection made by seeing one another to an emotional level with your interest in the person.

Another great way to close the physical gap is to name drop. No, I don’t mean for you to talk about how you saw Johnny Depp at the local mall the other day. Lowndes gives the great idea of mentioning your caller’s name a couple times during your conversation. Hearing their name not only keeps their attention, but also reinforces the idea that the conversation is directed to them. That may sound silly, but think about it: there’s no eye contact, no hand gestures, and certainly no physical intimacy.  So aside from having your phone lines connected, you don’t have anything else linking you two.

Taking these two points into consideration, you are bound to increase the number of contacts you make over the phone. For more communication tips, be sure to read up more on How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes.

How can we perform in an interview when we don’t know how to sell ourselves! Think of yourself as a brand. For example, on a bottle of shampoo you can read the strengths and benefits of the product: fresh fragrance, conditioning, strengthening, volumizing, etc. Define your natural abilities and learn how to highlight them during an interview.

We will never be fully prepared for all the extreme questions thrown at us in an interview. One time I was asked, “If you were a bottle of hairspray, what color would you be and why?” In retrospect I can clearly see several reasons why this question was asked of me: to understand my creativity, to gauge my knowledge of the industry and (most importantly) to see how well I know myself. Answering this question with confidence was crucial. Can you enter an interview with poise and self knowledge?

Yes, I have studied all the lists of “Interviewing Do’s and Don’ts.” I could drive myself crazy memorizing rules: research the interviewing company, look the interviewer in the eye when shaking hands, sit down after the interviewer has taken his/her seat, be prepared to turn the “weakness” question into a strength, be equipped with questions to prove interest, ask for a business card before exiting; the list could go on infinity. Trying to recall what to do and what not to do would make it impossible to focus on the conversation.

The best advice I have does not come from that list of tactics. What is my secret ingredient? BE YOURSELF. I think the anxiety of having done my homework before going into the interview is what makes me nervous. Am I really prepared? I remember, yes I am ready. Before the interview, when my heart is beating at double pace, I pause, breath, and close my eyes. I take a few minutes to regroup and repeat a mantra. I practice relaxing and realizing that no one is perfect during the interviewing process. Self-awareness has always been my greatest asset. With that assurance, I know that the appropriate response to any question is always within reach.

The train was delayed over 40 minutes Monday. Faces of anguish, angry sighs, and complaints rumbled through the train. It didn’t solve anything.

Everyone has the right to complain, but not everyone wants to hear it. Complaining doesn’t help unless you offer a solution. Who would you prefer to hire– an energetic, driven and optimistic individual or a sluggish, apathetic, and pessimistic person?

Email me at ken@jointap.com and ask a question or comment on the post. Just no complaints… unless you have a solution.